How Family Involvement Can Help in Recovery
Addiction is a family disease. It affects the addict and everyone close to them. Living with the chaos and fear that an active addict causes in the lives of those around them eventually leads to a myriad of ineffective coping mechanisms. Nothing the family does seems to help, so they either withdraw in fear and anger, or (and there’s always at least one) they redouble their efforts to control their loved one’s addiction. This leads to a level of codependency that can border on insanity.
These well-worn coping mechanisms don’t go away just because the addict gets sober. The withdrawn father or spouse remains withdrawn, protecting themselves from yet another return to active addiction. The codependent wife, parent or sibling continues to try and control every aspect of their loved one’s life in an attempt to avoid another relapse. None of this helps the newly sober person navigate the already treacherous waters of early sobriety.
It is crucial that the family begins to participate in some form of their own recovery – therapy, Al-Anon or whatever is available. This will help them learn how to support their loved one’s sobriety and let them begin the process of healing. Changes do not happen overnight, and without guidance and support, they may not happen at all.
Recovery from active addiction takes a long time – a really long time. Progress is slow and this can be a source of frustration and confusion for a family trying to support their loved one. By connecting with others who have more experience and understanding of the recovery process, each family member can learn what to expect along the way. They can learn which of their actions are really supporting their loved one’s sobriety and which are actually detrimental to recovery. Perhaps most importantly, they can begin to learn when NOT to help, even when every fiber of their being is screaming that something must be done. This is almost impossible without the support and guidance that a program of recovery provides.
As a part of the MAP Program, the MAP Specialist works with the addict AND their family members, to guide and support each of them in a program of personal recovery. Using the data we collect as a part of the Program we are seeing a marked difference in recovery rates between the addict whose family is actively participating in a program of support and those whose families are not.
Based on MAP Live Data collected prior to December 2014, below are some interesting statistics:
Addiction is a chronic, fatal illness, and while there is little the family can do to get or keep the addict sober, there are things they can do that help. Getting involved in their own program of recovery is one of the most powerful actions a family member can take to support their loved one’s recovery.
